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Ang Lee and the Uncertainty of Success

February 28, 2013 by David

“It’s common to hear “follow your bliss” or “do what you love and success follows.” Sounds great, right? Except here’s one small detail: You never get to know if it’s ever going to happen. You don’t get to choose if and in what form the success manifests; you don’t get to choose when it arrives.”

— Jeff Lin

In my newsletter last week I addressed the issue of startup founders with insufficient passion… you might want to read the thoughtful piece by Jeff, from which the quote above was pulled:

http://jeffjlin.com/2013/02/23/ang-lee-and-the-uncertainty-of-success

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Jeff relates his view of the director Ang Lee, whom he interviewed before he was “successful” and operating at scale, and reveals vital information about Lee’s journey which you may not know.  And whether you are a lone wolf entrepreneur, or a leader fighting to break through, Jeff has some perspective you’ll want to ponder.

(He’s also a great writer, and the piece is thought-provoking even if you are not an entrepreneur)

Filed Under: Entrepreneurs, Sometimes A Blog Tagged With: entrepreneur, goals, perseverance, startup

What Do You Really Want?

February 19, 2013 by David

As a venture capitalist, I met many engineers attempting to raise money for their startup tech company dream.  A pattern quickly emerged, which I hadn’t expected.  They couldn’t tell me why they wanted to start a company.

Often there was no passion as they struggled to explain Why.  And frankly, their explanation often sounded scripted.  Understandably, they were trying to tell me what they thought I wanted to hear – a common symptom when founders are trying to raise money.

As the pattern further developed, I eventually realized that they weren’t capitalists.  Almost none could tell me what their business model was for their company, let alone tell it with passion.  The simple reason: they weren’t passionate about the business.

This alone wasn’t reason enough to turn them down, but it was a huge red flag.  You won’t find many successful businesses, let alone high-risk speculative startups, without a passionate leader to take them through the very tough parts.  They have to really, really want it.

In fact, one prominent angel investor I work with told me years ago that he has never lost money when the founder was pursuing his or her passion – its not his only requirement for investing, but it is his most important one.

As it turned out, I found that many startup founders were primarily motivated by the desire to have independence.  Simply put, they wanted to control what they worked on, to choose who they worked with, and even the office space in which they worked.

And they didn’t realize it.

There are two problems with this.  First, they’re usually not going to get funded.  Passion for obsessive control is not a successful investment criteria for any investor (regardless of the homilies for Steve Jobs).

Second, if they somehow succeed in getting funded due to special circumstances (e.g. misrepresenting their motive of control; a frothy market for investment in the category; luck) they will be replaced as the leader by their investors at the first opportunity.

And this is truly unfortunate.  Reputations will suffer, months or even years of work will be sacrificed, and often teams will splinter irreparably, despite long-term relationships.  And the founder won’t get what they wanted in the first place!

This is just one example of misery due to not understanding what you Really Want. There are others…

You probably know a lawyer or two who are miserable in their chosen profession, despite having loved law school.

Engineers who discover they love teaching far more than working as an engineer.

And technical founders that never really wanted to run a business and revel in capitalism.

Often this can be avoided by a practice of mindful choices, along with a few tools.

Wants

Most of my clients are familiar with a simple, but demanding exercise I take them through.  I’ll summarize the key concepts for you here:

First, we need to distinguish between what we Want from what we Need.  Wants are aspirational, often thoughtful and informed.

For instance, if asked, most entrepreneurs will say that they Want “Integrity” in their life.  After all, who would say they don’t want to act with integrity?   Other examples include the Want for “Creating”, “To Be Appreciated” and “Financial Success”.

The exercise I use guides you through the thought experiment of trading off various Wants against each other, so that you can decide their relative importance in your future decisions.  A simplistic example would be “Choose one of Rich and Famous, but not both… which do you want?”

There is no right answer, and so the exercise is to determine your most important Wants. 

Of course, you could avoid the hard work, and make a list of 20 or even 30 aspirational goals, something like “To always act with integrity, while becoming rich and famous, and controlling every single thing and also being appreciated as a loving sensitive person who can relate to anyone… etc. etc.” but it wouldn’t be very practical.  Or realistic.

And the research shows that we can handle a limited number of goals and aspirations at any given time; I usually suggest no more than five.

Part of the exercise is designed to “get around” the intellectual, analytic part of our mind that tries to run most of the decision-making and goal-making in our lives… and get to latent Wants that have gone unnoticed because it’s not part of the intellectual, theoretical view of ourselves that we hold (or that we inherited from our parents).

Clients often uncover Wants that are deeply meaningful and touching, that didn’t make their first draft list of the most important.  This is when individuals sometimes realize (for instance) that they’ve always loved teaching; they’ve always loved tinkering; they’ve always loved creating products. 

Now we’re getting somewhere!

(And my investor colleagues would be interested in hearing about a startup that taps a founder’s life-long passion).

Needs

The second aspect of this topic is understanding your underlying Needs. Needs are the fundamental requirements that you can’t modify.

For example, one of my clients knows from long experience that she “needs” demanding cardio exercise at least every other day, if not 5-6 days a week.  Without enough of it, her physical self affects her mental self, and thus professional effectiveness, even her personal relationships.  She becomes edgy, even a little depressed.  If you aren’t like this, you probably know someone who is.  This isn’t a “Want” because it isn’t aspirational, and she can’t really “control” it in any simple way, it is an underlying drive.

A darker example of a Need would be an alcoholic that needs a drink, or really any addiction, including the addiction to always be working.

We will do almost anything for a Need – such as those previously described Founders who fib to their investors (and/or themselves) about their Need for control.

The relevance of the Need is that we want to understand it, without judgment.

Why?  Simply put, Needs that aren’t understood and identified, have a habit of sabotaging our work, our journey, and our relationships.  Regardless of whether it is a positive Need such as needing daily exercise, or a negative Need, such as controlling every small detail in product development, the first step is identifying it.

This part can be tough – our self-image, let alone our professional image or “brand” may not easily accommodate the insights about our Needs.

This process must be confidential, or the client will avoid the less flattering Needs or may not be able to admit to themselves what they really Want for fear of being seen impractical, greedy, or even unworthy.  This is one of the reasons why this can be very hard work.

But it is essential.  Even if there are no grand revelations, and the Wants and Needs documented through the exercise were known to the client all along, the clarity and written record creates a measuring stick that can be applied to future decisions.

I often encourage clients to review their final Wants/Needs inventory on a periodic basis, and when faced with a difficult decision.  They can remind themselves why they may be tilting in a particular way on the decision, and with this self-awareness, make a better decision consistent with their long-term goals.

And those unfundable technical founders I kept meeting in venture capital pitches?  They were mistaking their Need for control to be a Want for entrepreneurial work.

They will be far more successful if they find a role where their control requirements are a welcome attribute, or by partnering with an entrepreneurial leader who is passionate about capitalism.  And in the end, they’ll be far more happy, getting what they really Need.

 

Filed Under: Coaching, Entrepreneurs, Sometimes A Blog Tagged With: business venture, entrepreneur, founder, goals, passion, shared values, startup

Question Your Founding Principles

February 2, 2013 by David

As I often do, I draw from the curious observer Seth Godin to see what he’s thinking about loyalty.

In particular, loyalty to your founding principles– whether you’re a non-profit, a startup business, a family business, or heck, a family.

His point is “It’s not disloyal to imagine a future that doesn’t include your founding precepts.  It’s disloyal not to.”

Check it out here.

Filed Under: Sometimes A Blog Tagged With: founder, founding principles, goals, leadership, loyalty, shared values

Metrics… for Life

November 19, 2012 by David

My clients will recognize my constant encouragement to set measurable objectives, and then utilize consistent process to apply metrics consciously and mindfully… for business goals and career goals.

Now there’s a book that helps define the benefit of this philosophy for your personal life, particularly if you are a busy and forward-driving executive or entrepreneur.

Clayton Christensen of the Harvard Business School wrote How Will You Measure Your Life? after a series of life events propelled him to share his point of view (an amazing and moving story).

He writes that his first clue that there was a problem with ensuring a happy and successful personal life was when he attended an HBS reunion to discover that nearly every member of his class had been spectacularly unsuccessful (and generally unhappy) in their personal and family lives, despite many accomplishments in their professional lives.  Sound familiar?

I appreciated Christensen’s realization that his classmates were extraordinarily gifted, with both talent and opportunity, trained to cast sophisticated strategy into aggressive business plans, and execute accordingly.  It wasn’t that they had planned to be unsuccessful in their personal lives, it was simply that they had no plan for their personal lives… and perhaps predictably, the results weren’t what they had assumed.

This realization is at the core of mindful and thoughtful coaching.  Set measurable objectives, explicitly and thoughtfully, and then scrupulously measure progress against the objectives.

I can’t recommend this book highly enough for every entrepreneur and business person; get it and read it.

Filed Under: Entrepreneurs, Sometimes A Blog Tagged With: clayton christensen, entrepreneur, goals, harvard business school, HBS, leadership, measurable objectives, metrics, objectives, work life balance

Accountability and Swift Termination

October 4, 2012 by David

Most experienced entrepreneurs will agree that they almost always took too long to terminate key employees when they don’t work out.

In World War II, the U.S. Army grew from 190,000 soldiers in 9 Divisions to 8,000,000 soldiers in 61 Divisions. General George Marshall is credited with instilling accountability in the officer ranks, including generals.

Below are excerpts from the Harvard Business Review article that I strongly recommend you acquire:

“As transformational leaders tend to do, Marshall began by focusing on people. He truly was ruthless in getting the right people in the right jobs—and the wrong people out of them. When Brigadier General Charles Bundel insisted that the army’s training manuals could not all be updated in three or four months and instead would require 18, Marshall twice asked him to reconsider that statement.

“It can’t be done,” Bundel repeated.

“I’m sorry, then you are relieved,” Marshall said.”

Can you imagine that in today’s army?

As you’ll learn in the article, the U.S. Army is no longer run that way (generals are almost never terminated, and certainly never swiftly when held accountable to a leadership goal).

Which way do you run your startup?  With accountability?  With swift action?

Filed Under: Leadership, Sometimes A Blog Tagged With: accountability, communication, founding principles, goals, harvard business school, HBS, leadership, measurable objectives, mindfulness, objectives

How To Choose A Coach

August 6, 2011 by David

Chapter 2

(From my upcoming book)

 

You’ve probably heard how fantastic coaches can be, and how they can truly leverage your commitment and investment.  You’re wondering if that’s really true, and if it is, how do you choose one?  And you may be wondering if the expense is worth it.

In general, coaching in almost any discipline or sport is “worth” it because the one-on-one attention can be so productive.  It is scarcely imaginable that a sports team could exist, let alone consistently win, without a leader with more experience than the players, the benefit of a “big picture” perspective, possession of a literal or figurative book of strategy, and the objectivity inherent in standing on the sidelines.  While there are exceptions to this rule, where the coach is also one of the players, the weighty load of leadership combined with sheer scale quickly pushes “player/coaches” exclusively into the coaching role — successful company officers in the military are continually promoted to roles away from the sharp end of the spear.  There is a long tradition of successful performance of individuals counseled and aided by effective coaches.

My First Coach

While both of my parents seem to have had the “math gene”, I credit my Uncle Stephen (an honorary title) for my achievements in math, high school Advanced Placement status, and a lifelong comfort with numbers and calculation.  He was my one-on-one tutor at the end of fifth grade.

Freed from the constraints of other students and a regulated pace, we quickly covered the necessary ground of my delinquency — to my parent’s horror I had somehow avoided learning my multiplication tables, and thus the recruitment of Uncle Stephen, a math professor from a university in Budapest, recently fled to the U.S..  Within weeks, we were covering elementary algebra, and then to my delight, moving on to geometry and base number systems other than 10, and so on.  Late into high school I would suddenly realize in class that I already had covered the material with Uncle Stephen, 5 to 6 years earlier.  What a gift.

If I have a profound regret in my 30 year career, it is my relatively late (and weak) adoption of mentors and coaches along the way.  Despite the deep lesson of Uncle Stephen, I made it a regular practice to go it alone, to tough it out, to prove to myself (and my parents, and others) that I “could do it myself.”  It wasn’t just that I had something to prove, it was a source of comfort and reassurance to myself that I was worthy, valid, and capable.  Even today, I value self-reliance and competence among the highest accomplishments one can achieve.  And it isn’t any coincidence that this is a measure that one can take of one’s self — external objectivity doesn’t seem necessary.  One can be self-reliant in measuring one’s self-reliance!

See where this is going?

Many, if not most, of the entrepreneurs I have met in the hundreds of startup companies that have contacted me for investment, endorsement, and assistance fit this profile.  They are confident, armored with thick skin, and ready to prove themselves.  And perhaps too ready to prove that they can do it without help.

What’s Important About Your Coach

As with any close working relationship, the first requirement is communication.  You’re going to want someone you feel comfortable talking to, and what that really means is that from your first interaction with a prospective coach, you should feel like you are heard.

I mean “heard” in the fullest sense of the concept — pauses where they listen, questions that clarify and confirm what they thought they heard you say (so that they can fine-tune what they heard), and the hard-to-describe sense that they “get it” about what you just said.  The style and specific tactics for achieving this will vary from coach to coach, but the results are easy to feel.  You are heard.

This isn’t just because it feels good to be heard (it does).  It is essential that they get your perspective, because they can’t help you achieve your goals unless they can hear you describe them.  And this isn’t just a one time deal — your goals will probably evolve, and certainly your situation will evolve.

By the way, their ability to “get what you’re saying” should be relatively instantaneous.  Their ability to “get you” and understand who you are, and where you are coming from, well that might take a while.

If you have any doubts about the listening abilities of your prospective coach (or your current coach!) then it isn’t a good match.

Shared Values

As we will discuss in another chapter, I’ve found that we’ve all developed coping strategies for getting along with other people.  Scientists have worked to quantify this, and better understand this, but to summarize their results — entrepreneurs are generally more successful when they have a highly defined “EQ”, emotional intelligence.  In contrast to I.Q., the ability to reason, use metaphors, and solve problems, EQ can be broadly defined as relating well to other people and communicating effectively with a broad spectrum of personality types.  For many experienced business people, it is no surprise that EQ is an indicator of success in business, particularly in new ventures.

Yet if you benefit from this advantageous attribute, it can undermine your choice of a coach.  In other words, just because you can get along with nearly anyone, don’t use that low hurdle in evaluating the fit of your prospective coach to your style of interaction.  Raise the bar, and seek a coach with whom you have shared values.

The coach-client relationship is most effective when it is intimate, in the sense that any subject, problem, or issue is within bounds.  Even extroverts may not share everything they feel, fear or hope for with their friends and colleagues.  Discussing fears and goals are part of the coaching process, but you’re just not going to get your full value unless you disclose them.  And you’re unlikely to do that with someone you can “get along with” but with which you share few values.

How do you determine your values, and your prospective coach’s values?

[to be continued]

Filed Under: Coaching, Excerpts from the Upcoming Book, Sometimes A Blog Tagged With: business venture, coach, communication, emotional intelligence, endorsement, entrepreneur, goals, investment, leader, leadership, mentor, officer, shared values, startup

New Book

Own Your Brand: An Executive Coach Helps You Refine Your Personal Brand on LinkedIn

Just released by Col du Granon Press, David’s first book is now available at bookstores worldwide.

About David

David has been advising entrepreneurs and leaders since 1998. He founded Flashing Red Light eleven years ago. More about David...

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